Show Me What I'm Looking For
by DroidChick
Summary: Three unlikely people share their heartache, experiences and one drunken night that leads to a pact: staying single for one whole year.
1. PROLOGUE

_A/N: So this little idea has been lingering in my brain for while and it would not let me sleep until I wrote this chapter. Enjoy, and I'd love to hear some feedback and constructive criticism if you have any. Thanks! :) _

** PROLOGUE**

* * *

"_Being single doesn't mean you're weak; it means you're strong enough to wait for what you really deserve." –Unknown._

* * *

**Z**oe felt lonely even though people surrounded her everywhere she went. She was sitting on her usual stool by the bar at The Rammer Jammer, sipping on her chilled white wine. It has been four months since Joel left Bluebell to work on the film adaption of his novel. They have decided to give the long distance relationship thing a go. It went horribly. She understood that he had a whole lot on his plate at that point in time but he could have at least found a few minutes from his schedule to actually talk to her. At the risk of sounding like a needy and annoying girlfriend, Zoe couldn't handle the fact that he wasn't in the same town. It's not like he completely abandoned her. He had asked her to go to Los Angeles with him but she couldn't leave her life in Bluebell for that long again. It did not work out well the last time.

Joel missed almost every _scheduled_ Skype video call, rarely answered his phone and replied hours after she texted him. Zoe was frustrated. It felt like he wasn't putting enough effort into maintaining their relationship. She was starting to feel like the only one actually in this relationship. So, after he missed the tenth Skype call in a row, Zoe snapped. She called his cellphone, which, _of course_, went straight to voice mail. She left him a heated message, which _loosely_ paraphrased; told him to go stick his head in his ass. He called back an hour later. She told him it was over. The odd thing was that Zoe did not even shed one tear, and she had been with him for almost seven months before he moved away. She just felt angry… And cheated.

The fact that lovey-dovey couples were all around her did nothing to help ease her aggravation. It felt like she was getting unluckier in love as the years went on. Her track record was proof of that. Her first boyfriend dumped her after six years full of dull small talk and barely any intimacy. Then there was George Tucker. He was off the market and her stubbornness convinced her that he was the love of her life. Later came Wade Kinsella. He came in and completely turned her life upside down and made her crazy before he actually cheated on her. Jonah tried to get her into a friends with benefits kind of thing but then she met Joel and for a while things were perfect but she found herself craving something more. It started to feel like he wasn't the right guy for her. At first, she tried to ignore this. She hid it away in the burrows of her mind as she tried to keep up the façade in hopes that it would magically turn into something more. Zoe realized all of that after she broke it off with Joel.

She looked at the end of the bar and saw Tom plant a kiss on Wanda's cheek. It was excruciatingly and disgustingly sweet. Was there something she was missing? What was it that Wanda and Tom Long had that she didn't quite understand? What was it that made their relationship work? Was there some kind of secret guide to romance that she hadn't received yet?

She let out a sigh as she put her glass to her lips. The cool liquid went down her throat and helped make her forget about her shitty love life, even if it was just for a little while. Zoe tried not to make it obvious that she was looking at Wade as he got off his shift and put an arm around Vivian's shoulder as he guided her out of the bar. He looked happy. Her cousin looked happy. Zoe felt an unknown feeling well up in her stomach. It kind of reminded her of what it felt like when she rode that huge rollercoaster in Six Flags after she had eaten too much cotton candy. It was not a good feeling at all. She wanted to feel happy for them but for some reason, she just couldn't.

Just when Zoe was about to give up and leave, she heard someone else let out a sigh as they sat in the empty stool next to hers. "It sucks, doesn't it?" Said Anna Beth Nass as she motioned to Wanda to take her order. Zoe assumed Anna Beth was referring to the lack of romance in their lives in a time where Wade Kinsella and even little Rose Hattenbarger had someone special in their lives.

"I'll drink to that." Zoe nodded in agreement, taking another sip from her glass.

"So, what'll it be, AB?" Wanda asked in her cheery voice.

"I'll have your finest scotch." The redhead said a little too eagerly. It seemed like she was already a bit tipsy to begin with.

"Whoa! Looks like someone's been having a bad day." Wanda exclaimed as she quirked an eyebrow before she turned around to get the scotch from the storage room.

"Try weeks." Anna Beth sighed, mostly to herself as she faked the smile she always used whenever things _weren't_ okay. It seemed like Zoe wasn't the only one that was trying to forget her crappy train wreck life. Usually, the two women would have an open talk about their issues but they both were too caught up in their own minds to even acknowledge each other.

Zoe was glad to be back home in her room. She was in her pink silk pajamas, the polkadot ones with the matching top and bottoms. She was in bed and had Mr. Snugglesworth tightly in her arms. He was the small elephant stuffed animal that she had won as a second place prize at a Spelling Bee when she was eight. He always helped her get through everything, from her failed residency application to her move to Alabama. Zoe was starting to feel like he was the only male in her life that she can truly rely on. Zoe pressed play on her remote control and began watching the first episode of what she hoped would turn out to be a marathon of Gossip Girl. Just when the perfect Chuck Bass finally told Blair that he loved her and that he travelled to her favourite cities to personally pick out gifts, she heard an untimely knock on her door. Letting out a hearty sigh, pausing the television with a pout and abandoning Mr. Snugglesworth in between the sheets, Zoe got off her bed. She made her way to the front door. She let out a breath, composing herself, as she pulled it open. She was not prepared for what she saw.

"_Lemon_?"

_**TBC?**_


	2. 1

_A/N: This update came earlier than I expected but what can you do when inspiration strikes? Anyways, I hope you'll like this first chapter. I'd love to hear your opinions about this story and even what you'd like to see. I also am over the moon by your reviews and ratings, even if they were just a dozen, they meant a whole lot. Thanks x_

**1**

* * *

_"Being brave enough to be alone frees you up to invite people into your life because you want them and not because you need them._

_–Mandy Hale_

* * *

**L**emon Breeland and Zoe Hart were not on the best of terms. It was quite understandable, really. The Southern Belle was left at the altar by her partner of fifteen years so that he could try being with the short-obsessed New Yorker. So, Zoe didn't quite blame her for all the awkward run-ins they experienced at public places like the Dixie Stop and any remaining, unresolved hard feelings. That is why the last thing Zoe Hart ever expected was to see Lemon Breeland on her doorstep at 1 AM, a little tipsy if she might add.

"_Lemon?_" The brunette exclaimed, her left brow rose all the way up to her hairline. She was so not prepared to handle a situation like this. "What are you doing here?"

"Well, thank you for such a warm welcome." Lemon said in a sarcastic slur, "I appreciate it, especially after the fact you ruined my life…"

Zoe cringed. She deserved that. She felt so guilty for what she had done to the blonde. Zoe Hart made an oath to fix people and save lives… And stealing away George Tucker from Lemon Breeland, no matter how unhappy she thought they were, was against that oath she was under and every moral principle she had. Zoe was still puzzled at herself for how her moments of weakness ruined a long relationship like that of the Golden Couple's relationship. She had never thought of herself as a home wrecker and even now, a year and a half later, Zoe still felt a pang of guilt and idiocy whenever she saw either George or Lemon. But before Zoe could say anything else, another person showed up behind Lemon Breeland's shoulder.

"Hi, Zoe!" She exclaimed, waving like the happy drunk she was.

"Anna Beth, hey!" Zoe said in what she hoped was her most convincing excited voice. "I'm going to ask one more time, why are you guys drunk and on my doorstep this late at night?"

"Well, isn't it obvious, Doctor Hart?" Lemon sniped. She was not a happy drunk, Zoe noted. Alcohol made her more uptight, if that was even possible. "We're here because we're the only single people in town, aside from Dash Dewitt."

"Whoa." Zoe found herself saying, "This is sad."

"Yeah." AB agreed, her fear of being a lonely cat lady was evident in her nervous chuckle and fake smile. "It is-Which is why we need to come in."

"I still don't understand." Zoe said, still not inviting the drunken duo in.

"I cannot believe that for someone so smart you could be so dumb." Lemon sighed, her voice was a bit shaky due to the amount of wine she must have consumed.

Zoe decided to take the half compliment and remain silent. It wasn't everyday that Lemon 'Stick-up-her-ass' Breeland said something remotely nice to her.

"We're here because we all need support at such a shitty time like this." Anna Beth quipped.

"And let's face it, we're all each other have." Lemon shook her head, not believing where life had her now.

"Now let us in, Hart!" AB slurred, "We've got ice cream and alcohol!" She said lifting up the plastic bag with the Dixie Stop logo printed on.

"You should have said that in the first place!" Zoe chuckled to herself. It must have been the loneliness talking because Zoe never, in a million years, expected herself to actually invite Lemon Breeland into her home.

* * *

"LIAR!" Anna Beth cried as she tossed her pillow on the television screen. Dan Humphrey had yet again declared his long lasting love for Serena.

The three women were snuggled under the white duvet, AB was in the middle whilst Lemon and Zoe were on either sides of her. There were dozens of chocolate wrappers, empty cartons of ice cream, and Oreos scattered all over the bed and floor. It eerily resembled how her old house looked after Wade cheated on her. Zoe had her tenth glass of wine in her hand- she wasn't quite sure because she had lost count a long time ago. AB had Mr. SnugglesWorth on her lap, and Lemon put another spoon of Ben & Jerry's key lime pie ice cream into her mouth.

"I now believe that the love of my life will always be ice cream." She stated, chewing on her lower lip.

"Who needs Lavon, anyways?" Anna Beth agreed.

"And Joel can just kiss my 'clingy' ass." Zoe added, making quotations with her free hand. Joel had actually called her that on their break up call. Sighing, Zoe took another gulp of the red wine the girls brought.

Both AB and Zoe looked at Lemon expectantly, waiting for her to contribute to their bitchy ex-bashing. She was uncharacteristically quiet. As she looked at her, the petite doctor realized that Lemon was just as bitter and vulnerable as she was, that she wasn't always some bionic future housewife. Lemon was actually hurt and she had no one to turn to but Anna Beth… and, now, Zoe was added to the short list.

"I just…" She tried to come up with the right words to communicate her feelings but she closed her mouth again. After a while of silence, not the awkward kind, Lemon began to speak again, her voice was barely a whisper. "I'm going to be alone forever, aren't I?"

Anna Beth and Zoe glanced at each other. Their expressions were somber. Lemon had just voiced all of their deepest fears, the ones that were there but weren't fully acknowledged yet.

Were they really destined to be a trio of mismatched spinsters binge eating and watching bad soaps? Were they not destined of some great love? Did they not deserve that? Didn't everyone _deserve_ to be loved? _Even Hitler had love._

Lemon Breeland looked at the tiny woman that had singlehandedly ruined the perfect picture she had of her life, the one with the perfect lawyer for a husband, the three kids (a pair of twins and a little toddler), and the picket white fence. A year ago, she would have tore Zoe's head off if she had gotten this close to her but now, Lemon felt something different… She felt like maybe she owed her a thank you. Though she would never actually say it out loud, maybe not yet. Because now that she thought about it, Lemon now saw that maybe things worked out for the best. Sure, she had loved George, once upon a time, when she was eight. She was now a grown woman… and this life she had almost trapped herself into was no longer what she needed. She had outgrown that fantasy. Now, it was time for her to find another one. Another thought popped into her head, a possibility that she had never even considered before. Maybe that's why her mother left.

The room was quiet. The tension in the room was thicker than it had ever been. Their eyes fell back to the plasma screen TV Zoe's mom had bought her. They continued to watch the ill fates of the overly dramatic New Yorkers unfold, without so much as another word addressing what had just happened. Lemon had to admit; she had never thought she would ever relate to a group of Yankee, rich, snobby teens so much. This show was kind of therapeutic. She let out a shaky breath before she rested her head on AB's shoulder.

Anna Beth was unhappy. She had tried her best to pretend that she was whenever she was out in public. But she was finally happy that she could let her mask slip off. Now that she knew that there were two other people that could relate to how she was feeling. Her two friends knew what it was like to lose hope, everyone you love, and even a friendship or two. They knew all the pain and hurt and bitterness she was feeling was justified. They did not tell her to get over it and move on, like her parents had told her to. They did not tell her to_ tough it out_ and maybe, _just_ maybe, she might get lucky. They didn't try to convince her that after a failed marriage and the end of the relationship that made her the happiest she'd ever been, she could magically stumble upon a knight in shining armour. But, now, for the first time in forever, Anna Beth felt something. She felt a _slight_ glimmer of hope. It wasn't that bright. It was dim but it was _hope_, nonetheless, and she hadn't felt that for a _very_ long time.

Zoe's brown eyes met Lemon's. She gave her a small smile. If you had told her just yesterday that she was going to be having a girl's night in with Lemon she would have offered you a free check up. But now she saw that maybe she and the southern belle had more in common than they thought. It took a while but Lemon smiled back. It seemed that Lemon was thinking the same thing as they made a silent truce.

_Maybe this friendship could work. It's not going to be easy but maybe it's what all three of them needed._

* * *

It was 5 AM when the girls decided to turn off the TV. They were sitting in the kitchen. Anna Beth was rummaging through the fridge, looking for the ingredients she needed to make the pie she was suddenly craving. Zoe was sitting on the stool by the island and Lemon was on the one next to hers.

"Zoe." AB, with her head in the fridge, whined, "Do you EVEN eat? Your fridge is empty."

Lemon chuckled. Zoe just shrugged when Anna Beth turned around to meet her gaze. "I swear, no wonder you're so skinny—I NEED PIE!" She groaned.

"I don't think eating our feelings will actually help us feel better, AB." Lemon sighed, "No matter how delicious pie can be."

"I think this might be the alcohol talking…" Zoe said, a horrified look on her face, "But I'm with Lemon on this one."

Anna Beth pouted in defeat.

"I think…" Lemon began, her eyes brightened. She looked like she got an idea. "I think we should make a pact."

"A pact?" Zoe and AB said in sync.

"Yes." The Blonde nodded eagerly.

"What kind of pact?" Zoe eyed her suspiciously.

"To stay single for a year." She replied, obviously pleased with herself.

"365 days? No boys? No dating?" AB made sure.

"No hookups?" Zoe and Anna Beth both gasped in unison.

"Yup!" Lemon said with a confident smile, "That would give us time to actually figure out who we are and what we want."

"In the words of Lavon Hayes…" Zoe blurted out, "NAWNAWNAWNAWNAW!"

"Although I would have rephrased it differently." Anna Beth commented, with a quirked brow. Zoe felt bad about reminding her friend about her ex. "But I agree."

"Come on." Lemon negotiated, "We can do this. We're strong, independent women—We owe this to ourselves!"

Zoe bit her lower lip. She gave AB a consulting look. Lemon started to grin like she had invented the cure for cancer. She had convinced them.

"When you put it that way…" Anna Beth said, "Sure. I'm in."

"So am I." The doctor agreed, "But I am jumping ship as soon as Chuck Bass shows up on my door step."

Lemon and AB started to laugh.

"Fine." Lemon said with a smile, "Chuck Bass is the only exception to this pact. So, unless he magically appears, we're doing this."

"Together." Anna Beth said, making it sound more like a question than a statement.

"Together."


End file.
